Farewell to Artist Angst - Part 2

Last September I wrote about finding a new definition of myself as an artist in Finding Freedom, Fun and Myself in Waterford. It was a joyous - if somewhat belabored - apologia of myself as an artist. My own definition is/was "someone who opens herself to the world and expresses herself with abandon", with the key ingredient being abandon, letting go, and play.

This morning I woke up with a new thought: Call me an ACCIDENTAL ARTIST!

I am proud to say I am an amateur artist: I do art work for the pure love of it! If you know your Latin derivations, that's exactly what amateur means. Being an amateur greatly increases one's freedom - go wherever you are lucky enough to have the muse lead you - without concerns about the product.

Anyway, today I stumbled on the idea of ACCIDENTAL ARTIST. That's what I am! And a wonderful thing it is to be! This can only be explained by relating the latest turns on my artist's journey. I guess the latest twist started with a course I took called Art Jump and it certainly got me jump started! The course was comprised of various processes: marbled paper, paste papers, French-fold books, nontraditional silk-screening, whatever. The power of the course was in the teacher, a woman who nurtures spontaneity and fun.

In the course, when we got to the "books", it started with brown paper, gesso and freeform color with pastels. Freeform, in this case, means fairly mindless. We were told, for instance, to use our alternate hand [righties using their left, and vice versa]. Since the paper was later folded into a book, one really couldn't think too much. Just play! After the paper is folded, there are 3 spreads + a front and a back. That's when one decides if an image is finished or not. On the first book I took wing! Off I went! By the next class I had finished my book. I had considered it the basis for 3 collages + front and back! I used the marbled papers and paste papers and much ephemera to make, I guess you would call it, a highly embelished collage "book". It wasn't until much later in the course that I realized that that was not a direction that the teacher would have had in mind. For I realized she is something of a minimalist. "Less is more" was also a lesson for me in the course.

Yet, off I was: flying! The impetus was the freeform beginning. Working spontaneously - like doing tissue paper decoupage [See The Joy of Paste and Paper]. It was so freeing! It brought the joy of serendipity into my work. Next I was finding all sorts of things to make into "books". Two of my best were: one totally in fingerpaint on shelf paper - the other on an old charcoal drawing with pasted tissue paper on top. I had completed many books by the end of the course - not stopping there. Then I took another course, just for a day where I learned another technique using paste and silk organza. Soon I had developed my own variation based on Art Jump! I contiued to soar!

While all this work was going on I finished a major project that I had in the works before the classes. Two collages called family constellations - welcoming new members into the family. In the process I had an aborted attempt. I had pasted some handmade papers, my own marbled papers and my own painted tissue paper on foam core board - to be the background for the constellations. The next day when I went to check on the board - OPS! Too much water in the pasting! The board had curled into a perfect U! Not having worked with foam core before, I had a quick lesson. Not knowing what to do I put water in a bathtub and submerged the board in order to salvage some of the paper. Afterwords, [wish I could remember how long], I did just that. I tore off as much paper as would come off - sat the board aside and put the paper to dry. At some point, I noticed the board had straightened. So, it eventually made its way to my studio. Later as I was working on something else I noticed it out of the corner of my eye. "Do I see what I see?" started whispering in my head. I literally did about a triple-take! That leftover board was beautiful - an abstract image of mountains! No, it can't be; it's trash! So, I just left it there. Many days later my friend and artist came visiting my studio: she stopped dead and said, "Suzanne, what's that?!" The amazement on her face was greatly increased when I told her the process. Just the beginning of ACCIDENTAL ARTIST!

One of my next projects: I found on old canvas on which, twenty-some years ago, I had painted with oils a background of a seascape. I never had the nerve - nor perhaps the technique - to do the foreground. I decided to do the foreground in tissue and papers - rather spontaneously. [What did I have to lose?!] The result is extraordinary. Who knew tissue on oils would work so well?

Next, I saw a picture on an online meditation site; it is a picture of reflections on water: yellows, golds, blues, greens, oranges. I decided I would make that as a tissue paper collage. It didn't go well. My colors lacked subtlety and sufficient gradation. I kept looking for ways to reduce at least the former: Glazes, pastels, whatever. Then I tried pasting a piece of silk organza on top. Still didn't work. So, the next day, I tore the silk organza off! Hmmm, some of the dye from the paper came with it. Hmm. I pasted the organza on a piece of canvas board. Voila! My Reflections piece!

So, now you know why I'm the ACCIDENTAL ARTIST! Hanging in my home [not an everyday thing] are: Mysterious Mountains, The Storm [seascape], Reflections - oh, and a triptych collage made mainly from those papers torn off the foam core board!